I was rocking Monkey today and found myself looking around his room. When Noah died it took months (about 8) for us to take down his crib. We put up a shelf to hold his favorite stuffed animals and mementos of his life. That shelf is still in Monkey's room. I look at it and wonder if it is fair to keep Noah's belongings in his room. From the outside, they are just stuffed animals, but they were his. I have thought about boxing them up, but I just can't do it. Is it wrong to keep the pictures of my boys together in their (Monkey's) room? I don't want him to grow up in his brother's shadow. It is a part of his life, but should not define him. How do I do this without scarring him in some way? I am thinking of redoing his entire room. Maybe it would be a clean start. A new room for just Monkey. The memories should be kept elsewhere. I just don't want to saddle him with any kind of guilt or sadness. I just can't quite bring myself to put what is left of Noah's life in a box.
1 comment:
Hmmm. this is a tough one.
I spent a long time defining how Emma would be part of this family without her sisters feeling like they were..well you know.
My two cents: you could move the memory shelf to a common room in the house. It says that Noah is and always be part of your family, but Monkey is free to be himself.
I just wrote a post called, The first snow about siblings separted by space and time. This has been on my mind too.
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